My Dirty Boxers

  Happy birthday Bode my guy. Stay kingling. (Photo credit: Naija Pundit) I woke up with this funny sensation in my left eye and I’m a little worried. It’s painful and it gets worse if I get sharp exposure to rays of light but what am I Supposed to do when I’ll be staring at the laptop all day? Lemme digress. Today is Bode’s birthday. He is a friend and a brother from the famous Naija Pundits group. Bode is cool by all standards; he is our resident tech guy and he’s always there to answer all our tech needs. Since Maxi moved to the UK, he also doubles as my DSTV renewal guy. Speaking of DSTV renewals, Bode tries to remind me a day before the due date which is typically the 11 th of every month and he’s always quick to bring product information to us – he works with a tech firm that supplies support to Multichoice, which explains why he’s able to help. Bode once tried to link me up with a lady lol, that was long ago by the way; 2016 to be precise but it ended in tears, all bl...

  The cucumber is no longer funny, content creators need to step up or seek other hustles. (Photo credit: YouTube) So, today I’m a lot busier than the third mainland bridge but I have to be here anyways. I am going to be talking about another nonsense that society has normalized and until they start recording dead bodies, people won’t learn. Creativity is vast and you can’t really limit creatives but this prank industry is becoming a menace to the entire existence of humanity. I am actually of the opinion that someone probably has to be jailed for these guys to stop the nonsense, it’s no longer funny, can y’all stop? It was fun when the prank thing started. Lots of people have created interesting pranks that we have enjoyed over the years but these new sets have abused the trend and it’s no longer funny. Now it’s even more dangerous and if care is not taken, lives would be lost. I saw one yesterday, a lady was invited for transactional sex and after all the agreements, the la...

  Communication is key, most people need to know this before rushing into relationships. (Photo credit: Google) It’s my sisters’ birthday today but nope, I am not writing about them. I didn’t come to this world to serve those girls; I have written about them on this space about four times already. Happy birthday dearies, have fun and God bless you and your respective homes. That’s where it stops. I started something yesterday and adjourned to continue today. I had a conversation with Ebere and she was lamenting about her relationship struggles. She mentioned a few things that struck cords but I’ll dwell on just one of them and that is the phenomenon called COMMUNICATION. Personally, I understand the place of communication and its dynamics of it. I also understand that it’s okay not to be interested in talking at certain points but the non-verbal ones ruin things more than the noisy ones but most people don’t know this. I digress. One thing I know a lot of people struggle with...

  How can someone eat this? How do you people come up with devilish food combinations? I need answers. (Photo credit: Google) Hey people, good to have you here again today. I’ve been on the phone with Ebere for about an hour now and she’s ranting to me about how unhappy she is. Relationship issues will make the best of people cry but I’m not writing about that today. I mentioned unusual food combinations yesterday and it brings back memories of my days at BR. We had an “idea farm” session where we bantered about several ideas and then we plug them into brands that fit. I didn’t expect how this particular one turned out LOL. We mulled over a series of ideas as shared by a couple of people and then I asked casually, “what can we do around the nonsense combinations people conjure all in the name of food creativity?” and boom! Toyin jumped on it, KDS bought into it and the rest is history. Do you know that some people eat yam and rice? Noodles and beans? Okro on rice? Egusi on a ...

  Clearance sales and Black Fridays are part of marketing gimmicks but what is the integrity of the ones staged in this part of the world? (Photo credit: Google) I was mulling over writing about unusual food combinations while desperately waiting for feedback from Ayan concerning a video editor when I saw a post by Mowunmi. I don’t even want to talk about the pressure I suffered this week. We move. Speaking of the post from Mowunmi, when are we going to call out the fraudulence of the Nigerian version of “black Fridays”? I have three different experiences and I will mention each of them here today as evidence of this nonsense practice that we have come to encourage. Here’s the thing, these silly vendors keep screaming “sales, sales, sales” and it’s all a lie. They will call the same price they sell originally and now put a nonsense price above it, cross it out, and say they’re doing sales. The thunder that will strike you all is warming up (in Basirat’s voice). When you hear 20% of...

  Thank you for everything Basirat and see you soon. I love you. (Photo credit: Deepsea) For the sixth time in just a little over six months, I’m having to say goodbye to another teammate. I feel a little unlucky because I keep losing capable hands and I honestly don’t know how to feel. I’ve spoken about waves that didn’t come from the seas many times and also about the bleeding wounds that didn’t come from bullets or stabs; life throws things in our way but we can’t complain because, at the end of the day, we’ll be reminded that it is what it is. Trend left just after two weeks of my resumption and I had to live with it; Dara walked not long afterward and while the Justin situation was pathetic but understandable, having to lose Jason the Jamaican in the same month left a bad taste in my mouth. And then Queen Latifah had to move on to greater things, good development but I was stripped of a great help. And now, the backup that cushioned the Latifah effect, Basirat is leaving...

  Thank you for being an inspiration, congratulations and happy wedding anniversary. (Photo credit: Kenny Gold-Jegede) Today is my brother’s wedding anniversary, Mr. Gold I and LG, his heartthrob are ten years old in marriage today and beyond being happy for them, I am inspired. I know one or two nonsense people will ask me why I’m not married LOL, is marriage for everyone? If you don’t getat but today’s article isn’t about me, it’s about Maxi and LG and I am just here thanking God for them while also drawing inspiration from them. Where do I start from? I remember missing their engagement in Ife because I was writing my final exams in school; it was kinda strange to me that my brother was getting married and even though we had differences that bordered on individual differences, you can’t question the love. Their wedding was dope, the bride’s family came through with mad hospitality and to date, the relationship between the two families is enviable. There’s no event that hap...

  Ronaldo somehow entered the conversation yesterday but is it time for both of them to exit the stage? (Photo credit: LV) Omo! If you have followed me a bit or engaged me on certain topics, you’ll know I don’t make absolute statements on some topics. An example is the CR7 – Lionel Messi and Wizkid – Davido debate but the one that happened yesterday left me in no man’s land. Argentina lost to Saudi Arabia yesterday LOL, I know you won’t understand but I kinda lost more than Argentina but let’s leave it that way. Folks were dragging their GOAT after the game but the other guy, the legend of Old Trafford decided to steal the dragging. It’s no longer news that Manchester United have parted ways with Cristiano Ronaldo after his weird interview with Piers Morgan last week; the news is the fact that he managed to enter the scene on the day the entire universe chose to drag Messi and his teammates after their shock loss to Argentina. I will come back to Weezy and OBO another time bu...

  I'm back in my corner at the theatre of dreams, feeling good and ready to go. (Photo credit: Ramsey's iPhone) So, I’m back at work today after a whole week off due to my eye surgery. It feels good to walk into the theatre of dreams again after a whole week out. Feels good to be back at the Theatre of dreams; it’s not a full house really, Sandy Mandie is not in town and you can tell. The energy goddess herself, not like she’s not representing online, I am feeling her heat from the UK as I type, and trust me, it’s all for the win. Tolu (Pastor Asake) is standing in for the King of boys and I don’t envy him. I doubt that guy has slept for up to four hours in three days. Back-to-back executions and now he must understand the hard work Sandy does. I feel like laughing at him but I won’t because I’m a good guy. My men, Innocent the resident DJ of the kingdom is buzzing as always; a happy child with zero worries as long as yall allow him to run his P at the other end with Fisa...

  I understand the cruise culture but can we stop encouraging nonsense all in the name of bants? (Photo credit: Google) I’ve always been indifferent about some certain characters that somehow turn themselves into a public nuisance in the name of social media cruise, especially the ones that get paid while at it but I must say the followers or social media users encourage nonsense. I saw a series of tweets from foreigners dragging a certain Daniel Regha and I was wondering how we got here because I went to check his follower count and I couldn’t understand the rationale behind following a celebrity nuisance like him. There was Vic O, Speed Darlington, and Ordina Barbie when being a nuisance had value way back on Twitter but I doubt any of them was this irritating. Make no mistakes, if being a nuisance earns you some quids, I’ll happily ignore but who is paying Daniel Regha for his unsolicited advice? Nigerians celebrate rubbish; how does Gist Lover have so much following and c...

  I am standing with Brazil, they will win the World Cup. I said what I said. (Photo credit: Joy) The 2022 FIFA World Cup starts today and I will not be shifting grounds for non-football followers on my readers’ list. Y’all know I have tried and should indulge me today; if you don’t read it because you see it’s about football, God will judge you. You heard it first from me, France will not win the World Cup. In fact, France will have an underwhelming tournament, if you have placed your money on them as the gambler that you are, your money will burn because they will not go far. I have warned you. Neither Cristiano Ronaldo nor Lionel Messi will the World Cup, all of you can rest now and let your respective GOATs rest. I stand with both of them actually; I strongly believe two kings can coexist and if I have a gun to my head to choose between them, you already know my pick. Moving on to greater things, the World Cup is spiritual. It happens once in four years and it’s probably ...

  Dear friend, this is my note to you and I'm sure it will pass the right message. See you at the table of men. (Photo credit: Street Church) Today is International Men’s Day and it’s only normal that I remember my men and offer them some word of encouragement. I see all your efforts my G, the dark clouds will give way soon and the sun will shine again, rest assured bro. I know we’re endangered by everything. The narrative is always against us even when we deserve benefit of doubts but it’s fine; I am directing this at all of us that earn honest living and try to do the right things even when it’s not convenient, na man you be! Let’s have a drink today and discuss what makes us tick; let’s talk about opportunities and how we can rise by lifting ourselves. Let’s laugh at the girls that are not replying us and the ones that said they weren’t doing but now want to do when we’ve moved on (I did this on purpose). While at it, let me remind you that it’s okay for you to speak up. Y...

  I know times are hard and you're going through a lot but i beseech thee, whatever it is, eat first. Oluwa a wa pelu e o. (Photo credit: Eat First) As the year winds to an end, I want to use today’s post to encourage you to take some time out to enjoy yourself. I can understand why you’re saving so hard; you probably want to japa, rent is almost due, or you need to change your car? My brother, eat first. I was going to write about my eye surgery journey today, but I will let it wait a bit. I am fine now, by the way, just got back from a routine check and I can confirm that no one sees better than I do right now. Feel free to tag me to twerk videos and beautiful images, thank you. Back to my advice of the day, eat first. I read of an incident earlier today about a woman that slumped at the airport and from the report, she didn’t make it back to life. I know people would say lots of things and as someone that will never encourage fake news, I will leave details as I am not sure ...

  Oluleke Ishola Atanda, my friend from way back. Happy birthday G. Stay kinging. (Photo credit: Limo's status) I’ve written about Adewunmi Oshodi Tapa before so I wouldn’t bother much today. It’s her birthday and strangely, we’ve not spoken so much this year, to think we used to talk daily way back, we call her Madam Fix It. It’s also Limo’s birthday today. I met him way back and we literally grew up together. Limo and I started a musical career that was quite promising; he’s quite talented but I always thought I write better than he does, he obviously sings better and doesn’t have the Fuji undertone that I have. I could easily leave my house for days and stay at his that year, about twenty years now and his folks were always great to be with. His mom was leading the PDP women in her ward or even the local government at the time and I learned quite a lot from her. How do I describe Limo? Great guy, even if we don’t agree on many things. He is a lot diplomatic, lovable and am...

  Remember this guy from Anikulapo? Does Tinubu need to hire his own so he stops playing into the hands of his enemies? LMAO. (Photo credit: NETFLIX) I am very close to the realization that things won’t always go our way and, what makes us tick most times is the ability to live with reality and fashion a way out of odds. You can have it going great in your career and health will put you in check; you can be on top of your game on one front and something as basic as friendship will let you down at pivotal points, it has happened to the best of people is all I can tell you… Live with it. I’m not even in a good place to deal right now and again, it’s nothing. Whatever we can milk from life at each point, we will like we’re feasting on oranges. All will be well is the song I want to start singing, maybe not this minute but eventually, all will be well. By the way, I stumbled on a video of you people’s man and his howler LOL. I am going to be quick to let you know it is not new an...

  Sieve the stories and know when to kill fake gists. May the Lord be with you. (Photo credit: Google) I wrote about fake information yesterday and after reading over it again I figured I didn’t do enough justice to it. I will share two different stories that would give you an idea of the danger of peddling rumors. Just recently, an incident happened around Stadium in the Surulere axis of Lagos State. I’m an early bird so, I typically get to work before most people but on this particular day, nearly everyone else apart from the early risers (Myself, Innocent, and Olumide) didn’t come in until over an hour after normal resumption time. I was on Twitter and saw a post of a horrible accident on the Ojuelegba bridge and I panicked a bit; that’s the bridge most of my colleagues use to work and I immediately got on my phone to find out where folks were but it didn’t take long for me to find out what actually happened. Sandra already shared videos of how some physically challenged f...

  Beware of fake gist, it can ruin a nation. (Photo credit: Google) There was a time a bill was going to be passed by Nigerian lawmakers against rumor peddlers and I was excited because I always thought fake rumors can destroy nations and anyone found guilty of spreading fake stories should be duly punished. I remember my first year in Uni, Philosophy class was lit and the story of Socrates will forever ring in my head; I will share it today and hope we all refer to it anytime we hear a story, such that we don’t act on temporary information. Remember, wisdom is profitable to direct. Someone went to Socrates with a story about one of his friends, but before the person could go deeper, the great sage quickly stopped and asked if the person can take his story through his proven three sieves. They agreed to test the rumor and here you go. Socrates continued; the first test is the TRUTH; “have you confirmed this story you want to tell me?” The guy replied no. Socrates nodded, you ...

  I'm praying for you, just say amen. (Photo credit: Google) Hello and welcome to a new week. Today, the goal is not to bore you with plenty of English but to pray for you as you head into the new week. I pray you to find favor before God and man, such that half effort would look like you’re doing the most. I’ve seen people wonder how it’s clicking for some and they’re missing big time; it’s sometimes not by your speed or might but by the favor of the One that owes us no explanations. I pray mistakes to leave your path, such that people will not question your intelligence or your credentials; there are times you’ll try so much but a little mistake will make it seem you didn’t go to school or you’re not good enough, I hope you find the strength to say amen. I pray you the sun at its time and the rain in due season. Both are gifts from nature, but they have to come at the right time, so you don’t end up making a permanent decision from a temporary situation. I know it’s tricky,...

  I will be interested in audiobooks this period, please recommend some to me. Thank you. (Photo credit: Lindiwe) Guess who is here today without any aid? Your guess is as good as mine but while I’m grateful for a successful procedure, I’m going to be wise enough not to strain the eyes. I won’t talk about yesterday right now and it’s even a short post. It’s also not a gloomy post as all I have on my lips is thanksgiving as I have found favor before God. Here’s me marking register again today with a huge sense of gratitude because God is good and kind to me. It’s been a crazy week as always and it’s only normal that my surgery of yesterday would be the highlight but like I said earlier, this post isn’t about that. I think I should make this about my new week and the fact that I’m not looking forward to being at home as situations warrant. Close allies call me restless, while I like to differ, I guess I’m not the type that likes to stay in one place LOL and I have to find a way...

  For we have not been given the spirit of fear... In other news, if you don't like something, speak up about it as e dey hot. (Photo credit: Google) I’m coming quite early today for obvious reasons. Today is the day the Lord has made; I am not afraid, and nothing will go wrong. By this time tomorrow, it will be a tale of nothing missing nothing broken. I am confident in the balm of Gilead from the great Physician. We move. So, I had a reason to explain myself yesterday on gender imbalance and I’m quite surprised. I always thought I tried to protect women and gave them enough yards to excel and I’m not even talking about my article of yesterday; in fact, I wrote the article in the morning after a conversation with Deepsea. Anyways, my takeout from yesterday’s event remains that people should speak up when they feel slighted and not bottle it in. I am always guilty of sweeping things under the carpet because I like to make excuses for people, but it doesn’t always work like that...

  Not totally related but I remember we had to fly bike on our way to Demola's wedding that year with the emergency groomsman running late. (Photo credit: Art by Rex) It was February 2018; Demola was getting married and I was prepared to attend. Demola and I went to Lead City, he was based in Abuja at the time and I knew he was planning to relocate; in fact, the lady he was getting married to flew in from Canada for the wedding. Demola called me very early on Saturday (his wedding day) to ask if I’ll be his best man LOL. It wasn’t for lack of suit or swagz but I politely turned down the offer as I wouldn’t be able to stand for long through the process but I provided a solution. I called up Tunde immediately and told him to come to my house. The dude showed up about half an hour later and I ran him through my suits. In about an hour, we set out to Egbeda for the wedding, and lo and behold, Tunde met Demola for the first time and the rest is history. “Chairman”, “baba” and thre...

  What are your detty December plans? I have quite a lot and I can't wait. (Photo credit: Anita) We’re almost there, the Detty December season is knocking and I’m a little excited. A lot has happened from where I was last year, but I must quickly establish a fact, my December of 2021 was detty AF and I am looking forward to a dirtier 2022 edition. While many would take stocks and feel bad, I will dwell on the wins and leave the misses to God that knows best. I, Ramsey Abimbola Gold will not be interested in any part that didn’t go well, we don’t get it right all the time and that’s why we’re human. In all honesty, it’s been a great year and it could even end better than envisaged. Of course, I know there must be some dark clouds, but I didn’t send you to focus on the negatives. The good outweighs the bad so why won’t I celebrate grace? Let’s get the season started, please. So, here’s my Detty December plan. I will be attending every concert my team is working on and others th...

  Send me lunch tomorrow if you love me. T for thanks. (Photo credit: I don't even know) It’s a hell of a busy day. Struggling to work with the drama going on with my eyes and having to beat a crazy ass deadline, it is what it is. It’s a weird Tuesday. I still have a lot of Oyin on my mind and that’s enough to deal with. Here’s me saying thank you to everyone that offered 2 cents, they’re all highly appreciated. While I can’t even account for Oyin’s whereabouts as I type, I am sure she’s fine and I’ll sure mention it when I’m able to. Again, as always, we’re on the receiving end of the wickedness of our industry – working all night to get something ready for the client, only for the client to go execute elsewhere. It’s a lot of damage to confidence but we’ll continue to grind regardless. Are these internet providers ripping us off? I can’t get real value for data services and I don’t even want to talk about how many people are complaining around me. I can even understand Glo ...

  I am bothered about my friend, I hope she pulls through. (Photo credit: Google) I was on a work call this afternoon when Oyin (No way it’s her real name) called and to think I didn’t want to pick up as her call was intruding my debrief session with my colleagues; I picked to ask her to allow me to call her back but the first thing she said left me stunned. Oyin sells jewelry; her nickname is “Stone” which came from her family business – they’re famed for precious stones, and she inherited a rich establishment. She is 36, been married twice, first as a 24-year-old and then as a 31-year-old, both were separated by death. “ Ramsey, I want to end everything ” was what she said to me over the phone, now you too balance me, how will I end the call after hearing that? I knew my response mattered at that point and I dare not say nonsense, I quickly switched internet so I could still get something from the work call while listening to my friend. Oyin is a happy child, from a super-r...

  Ignore the dark clouds, nothing will go wrong. If it ever rains, it would be that of blessings. (Photo credit: Google) What are you afraid of? Listen to me today and take it to the bank, your worst fear won’t happen, and you’d regret giving in to doubts. Most of my big chances missed are from situations I expected the worst; the half-empty guys will tell you it’s the best approach to avoid disappointments but I’m happy to tell you that being positive doesn’t hurt much. You can’t continue to be negative and without eventually experiencing negatives, it’s that simple. It’s okay to have doubts and all; experiences may have taught you things you can’t easily get off your head but I need you to try. I have suffered from giving in to doubts and now I’m watching my bird of many colors sail off with zero hopes of return. As you dive into that relationship today, give love a chance without holding back. Stop thinking she will dump you, she’s probably thinking same. Stop thinking the...

  I am asking that you wear your thinking cap before you criticize what you can't create. Thank you. (Photo credit: Mo Abudu) I have seen lots of takes on social media on the release of The King’s Horse Man (Eleshin Oba), a movie by Mo Abudu, directed by the late Biyi Bandele and my question is: what exactly is the color of your ancestral problem? Because I don’t understand. I will be straight with you, it is the dumb and mentally weak people that usually have the strongest opinions on things they can’t create. I am a creative and I know what it means for people to stupidly critique ideas recklessly and yes, it is what it is. If you know me at all, I am open to second opinions; I don’t feel bad when people punch holes in my ideas. It is the reason I like Ese and Basirat, they will question everything until we arrive at something we can take to the bank, that’s how we win. However, you haven’t seen the movie but you saw people criticizing it on Twitter and you jump on the band...

  Seeth a man diligent in his works, he won't sit with mediocres but with kings... We're balling at the table of men. (Photo credit: NMA) I woke up with huge anxiety for obvious reasons; I had a date at the eye clinic, and I feared the worst already, but two great news soon cleared the air and left me feeling up to it again. Sandra’s text early on helped me feel better and just after my appointment, I got the news that we (Riquesa Africa) have been nominated among industry giants for the Experiential Agency of the year award category of the Nigerian Marketing Awards, did I hear you say, “it’s coming home”? I am not one of those that say awards are for egos, please inject it in my veins because all we do is win. I was going to share another touching story from my eye clinic but that can wait. Right now, I’m only thinking about Sandy Mandy walking that stage to receive the award, we’ll shut down Cubana. I can hear pessimists like Ebere asking “what if we don’t win”, LOL I’m...