2025... The good, the bad and things you won't understand

Probably my favorite picture of the year; genuine smiles, pure happiness and hope for a bigger and more rewarding 2026. (Photo credit: Seyi Lantern)

It’s been a minute since I showed up here. A long one. And what a year it’s been; dramatic, chaotic, occasionally graceful, and stubbornly human. The kind of year that hands you joy with one hand and says “manage this nonsense” with the other. Plenty of good, fair portions of bad, and yes, the occasional ugly cameo, because life doesn’t do edited versions.

Last night, while recording a podcast with IBK and AY of Ontario, a question surfaced — what were our most iconic sporting moments of the year? Innocent question. Dangerous consequences. Because it immediately shape-shifted into something deeper: what were my own iconic moments of 2025? And just like that, my mind took off without filing a flight plan.

Quick disclaimer for first-timers: read me for vibes, not structure. If you’re trying to connect dots, you’ll need a compass, a translator, and possibly therapy. I’m a terrible driver — on roads, in thoughts, in metaphors. You’ve been warned.

Okay, I promise, I will not talk about CLB on this one and, I will not explain why I'm angry with Reedah either. You already know the people who spike my BP the most; Gift is top of the list, Samuel my mechanic and every member of the HR group at Gbagada, all of them.

Now, iconic moments… before that, let me state for the record that Meenah should be voted Worst Agent of the Year. I did that in caps to emphasize how sad I was when she failed to close a seemingly simple deal. I know she knows Sonia like oxygen knows lungs, but I remain convinced she did not take my agenda seriously. Meanwhile, I was serious. I even prepared spiritually. Alas.

Speaking of Sonia, certainly not that Sonia I once wrote about. Nah, this one won’t get pregnant by accident, but let’s be honest… I wouldn’t put drugs past her. No evidence. Just vibes. On the balance of probabilities, Sonia dey smoke igbo.

She’s not alone. When I had to interview George, I paused several times to ask myself if I was emotionally ready. Because why is that boy like that? Quietly mad. Unassuming but profoundly annoying. He doesn’t ask nonsense questions like Slimee; he asks advanced nonsense. Still, we’ll go again. Trauma loves company.

Ah, Slimee. They gave me over six months to plan the 2025 Sequel. I hosted the party. If you missed it, the joke is on you, the invite was public. I was going to say something about Slimee again… but no. Growth. Moving on to greater things.

Back to my iconic moments of 2025. The first one involves something I’ve always publicly opposed, yet somehow found myself waist-deep in. It didn’t work. It may never work. But I explored it, and honestly? I’m glad I did. Let me tell it someday, in a language only Rambo understands.

Oh wait; before that. I almost wrote an article titled “Deliver Me From Azeezat” a few weeks ago. She was a thorn in my flesh at the time. Biblical levels. But we’re cool now. She’s literally shopping for a gift for me as I write this. Why do I take her seriously? I don’t know. But I do. May God help us both.

Of course, only colleagues can truly test my patience. Lanre, UG, and Olamide have all abandoned me. I’m patiently waiting for the inevitable “Hi Rambo, can we jump on a call?” from next week. When it comes, you’ll be jumping alone. I promise retaliation. Let me also remove the emoji I added to Jubilee’s contact. That kindness was a mistake.

You know how people weave elaborate tapestries of deceit around an idea just to look like saints? You can deceive everyone, except yourself. Whatever possessed me to entertain that person who went to gist Doctor AG nonsense is entirely my fault. I underestimated human creativity. I’ve fixed it now, but let it be known: that episode was rubbish.

To the one with many names, I don't even think I like any of them but, on the Holy Trinity, to God the Father, Jesus the Son and the Holy Spirit whom I disobey the most in this life, I meant it. Every word. Declining that infamous request was the right thing to do. The shouting match? Necessary. Cathartic. A release valve for the madness of the day. 

No regrets. Each time I remember the eyes that saw the wayward fling of my left hand that day, I always drop a token in a piggy in case the eyes decide to blackmail me. It's amazing how she never talks about it, maybe she did but to someone else... Oya nah, we go leg for front *in Reedah's voice*.

Now, to everyone who didn’t show up for Sequel despite receiving invites, congratulations, you’ve successfully disinvited yourselves from future events. And honestly, it’s for the best. The space was small, and as the boys have handed me hosting rights for the next one, preparations should begin now. Especially for those who left the room looking like a crime scene. Nonsense people.

You think I’ll skip the best thing that happened to me this year? Never. I waited three years for it. I restructured my lifestyle around it. Let me raise a glass to that win. And to those who microwaved the success with me, on to greater things, together.

This is getting long, and I haven’t even talked about my team. Certified mad people. But to be in that room, you must have at least a sprinkle of kolo mental. Fareedah too; LOL. From January, I hope she finds the Fast & Furious work she’s been praying for. I’ll make sure she stays busy.

That night, far away, in a place that is spiritually Ogun State but legally Lagos; with help from a couple of fans, a question was asked: “Do you normally ghost people?” It still rings in my head. Meanwhile, she pulled birthday stunts she hasn’t apologised for. And she won’t. I’ve accepted it.

Victoria deserves her own article. Not today. Nikky almost made it into this one, but no because, the man she’s been talking about lately still owes me confirmation. I’m tired of telling people sorry. I will reach out to her today even though I know it will end in arguments.

Still not writing about CLB. Okay, here's why: Err... Nah. Not today. I just randomly remembered the drama of the other time. LOL I don see shege for John's hand. Like Loveth once said, looks like I enjoy the organized chaos that space brings, maybe it helps to balance things for me, maybe not.

To the Iron Bender, of course I like things that spike my blood pressure. Arsenal. Tequila mixed with whisky. Rum on an empty stomach. I enjoy chaos. Why do I like Iron Bender? Not today. Ask me later.

There’s so much to unpack from this year. I’ll try to write again before Thursday. I will try to stay on topic. That’s a lie, I won’t. So here’s what I owe you:

• The story of the one with many names and her unholy trinity

• The chronicles of the Iron Bender and laced cookies

• Why I’m not happy with Reedah

• My full list of iconic moments of 2025

• Akorede and my plans for the people around him

I can’t end this without saying how much I miss my siblings. I’ll see them soon. We also welcomed baby Victoria recently; she’s here, and she’s beautiful. I made it till the end without ranting about Arsenal, talking about life as an orphan and CLB. I should drink to that.

Please resist the urge to ask me questions about this post. You won’t understand it. And that’s okay.

As Ayoka would say — love and light.