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Showing posts from June, 2023

Sweet Victoria... Will this pain ever go away?

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The hardest hour, moment of harsh reality. Dear Sweet Victoria, I'm in pains, if you can, send me help. (Photo credit: My baby sister) Since May 17 th , 2023, I haven’t been the same, and there’s no way in hell this would change anytime soon. It’s not for lack of effort; I am convinced within me that I am trying my best to snap out of this gloom, but it won’t just go away; it’s my biggest test yet. Just so we’re clear, I am not writing about my mom today, not even tomorrow, and I sincerely don’t know when I’ll have the courage to do so, but this is about how I feel; it’s probably the only thing I haven’t tried, so here we go. How do I feel? I feel naked, empty, and a little hopeless. I'm not sure I’m depressed; I’m certainly not suicidal, but the feeling is harrowing, and that’s me putting it mildly. Last night was tough; loneliness kind of made it worse, but for how long would I have to depend on someone’s presence? It’s unsustainable. Echoes of Mom’s last voice note won’t